Moving on from "Wife Swap"

On Wednesday night, I wandered into the living room when I heard my roommate laughing at something on TV. I asked her what she was watching and she announced, “Wife Swap.” I left the room after approximately 10 seconds. I’ve never been a huge reality show fan—and that’s an understatement—but this show was especially terrible. I read about it on abc.com, which brags, “two families with very different values are chosen to take part in a two-week long challenge. The wives from these two families exchange husbands, children and lives (but not bedrooms) to discover just what it's like to live another woman's life. It's a mind-blowing experiment that often ends up changing their lives forever.” I instantly lose respect—and interest—in any show that boasts that a season will bring, “tears, tantrums and raised voices as the wives clash with their new families.” And here I thought “Jon and Kate Plus Eight” was bad. Maybe it’s because I’ve been raised with a “we keep family matters in the family,” mentality, but I immediately thought, “who would ever be on this show?”

The next day, I was on the phone with my mom stressing about my study abroad visa, and she interrupted me to announce that a six year old Colorado boy was floating away in a helium balloon. Obviously very confused, I spent my next class reading about it on cnn.com on my phone. Immediately, a few concerns crossed my mind: a. What was this family doing with a large helium balloon in their backyard? b. The child’s name is Falcon. c. Where is Falcon??
Hours later, after planes were grounded, people were spanning the potential radius of the balloon for 6-year-old Falcon, and the nation watched in fear, the balloon landed—empty. Soon, however, during the desperate manhunt, Falcon is found, hiding in a box in the attic of the garage.

Doubts about the truth of the entire event arose, stemming from Falcon’s comment, “you guys said that, um, ‘we did this for the show’” when asked why he didn’t come out if he heard his parents calling for him. And with that one line, Falcon destroyed another of his parents’ apparently never ending schemes for publicity. Here is the video of the Heene family on “Larry King Live” being interviewed by Wolf Blitzer.



Since this confession, the general consensus is that this was a hoax and a desperate cry for attention. The credibility of the story decreases with each exposed detail of the family. According to TMZ, the family approached TLC (the station broadcasting “Jon and Kate Plus Eight”) about a reality TV show and even the station which seems to have impossibility low standards with shows like “Toddlers and Tiaras” and “I Didn’t Know I Was Pregnant” rejected the idea. Apparently, ABC had a different opinion on the family. Before the balloon hoax, the Heene family appeared on "Wife Swap" not once, but TWICE. I guess that answers my question of who would volunteer for that show.

With new reports that Flacon may not have even been hiding, local sheriffs have announced that they plan to press charges. The sheriff in Larimer County, where the Heenes reside, announced the family may face up to three felonies: conspiracy to commit a crime, contributing to the delinquency of a minor, and attempting to influence a public servant. While the first two are misdemeanors, the last charge carries a possible sentence of six years in prison.

While the whole situation is truly bizarre, this hoax is simply another incident proving the sad trend away from truth and responsibility and toward reality TV and desperate attention cries. From Heidi and Spencer to Patti Blagojevich, everyone seems to want the same thing: attention. The Heene family had a taste of fame on their first stint on “Wife Swap” but apparently their insatiable thirst for publicity. Obviously, their second experience on “Wife Swap” wasn’t enough either. These reality TV veterans still weren’t satisfied, and after proposing a reality show premise to various networks and achieving nothing, they finally have their 15 minutes of fame. And sadly, maybe more. Despite the legal problems the Heenes may face, their name and their story have been given worldwide exposure. Especially with the hoax allegations and the extremely low standards of reality TV, producers may see the Heenes as profitable and marketable. This whole situation may boost the “career” of the Heenes remarkably.

While their actions are truly abominable, the continued attention is only fueling their fire. Each article or broadcast news piece grants them more exposure and keeps their name in the minds of everyone. A Wikipedia page already exists, titled “Colorado Balloon Incident,” which cites 65 articles. The attention they are gaining from the alleged hoax, sadly, may be exactly what they need to finally achieve a TV career outside of “Wife Swap.”